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You should come with us. Because you know we're all going out and it could be a good chance for you to see what people are like outside the office. I think it could be fun.-Jim, "Pilot"

Jimmy: So you must have heard of me.
Gretchen: Vaguely.
Jimmy: What'd you hear?
Gretchen: Just that you're the worst.-"Pilot"

Bob's Burgers! [robot voice] Free sample! [laser noise] Come and get it! [fart noise] [fart noise]-Gene, "Human Flesh"

Now they can foreclose on Friday so come hell or high water, get the money to the bank on Thursday and then you are free and clear.-Billy, "Hell or High Water"

Our honeymoon, our honeymoon, our honeymoon
Say you want me too, say you want me too
Dark blue, dark blue-Lana Del Rey, "Honeymoon"

The American superstore. One-stop shopping for everything you could ever need or want. Do you want to be thinner? Fatter? Happier? Sadder? -Garrett, "Pilot"

Robin: This is important information! Are you here for the roommate posting?
June: Oh, yes, in fact, I-I-
Robin: Don't trust the bitch in apartment 23.-"Pilot"